45

This is a 45. This guy sold a ton of them for this label, so did the fab 4. My first 45 was called “Make Me Do Anything You Want” by A Foot in Cold Water. They were a Canadian band, it’s a great song. Helix did a cover but they mashed it.

Jean Francois Jacques is a “45″. 45 games into his NHL career he has yet to score a single point. It is impossible. The world in which a forward can go 45 NHL games (over 296 minutes, that’s longer than Gordon Lightfoot’s “Canadian Railroad Trilogy”) is beyond my ability to contemplate.

This is historic in its cruelty, like Art Garfunkel’s hairline and Bonnie Franklin’s acting.

I demand a recount.

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11 Responses to "45"

  1. Steve says:

    Man, I read your blog for the hockey, but I love all your musical references, even when they have nothing to do with Neil Young. The “longer than the Canadian Railroad Trilogy” thing made me snort.

    In conclusion, I’m basically fifty years old.

  2. Doogie says:

    Hey, I got those references, and I’m 21. (Did A Foot in Coldwater do anything else? I can’t seem to think of anything.)

  3. Lowetide says:

    They did a song called Isn’t Life Unkind In My Life, and then the lead singer ended up with a group called Moxy. I think I saw them at the Riv Rock Room but this is many beers ago.

  4. Rube Foster says:

    LT,

    My first 45 was Rain Drops Keep Falling On My Head by the immortal BJ Thomas. I was four, had my own suitcase record player and played that sucker till my parents ears bled.

    Lets hold out a glimmer of hope and believe for a moment that JFJ can at least become an EP. When you start to get compared to Art Garfunkel’s hairline you know things are dire. I digress…

    According to esteemed LT the 2007 Oilers will feature the likes of Chuck Lefly, Butch Goring, Gorman Thomas and Tommy Albelin. Outside of the Goring comp, I believe the inference is that perhaps this may be a bad thing. To be perfectly frank, I’d be as thrilled if Penner, Cogliano, Souray and Smid lived up to those comps as I am with the comps themselves. LT you truly are inspired, still chuckling about the Bonnie Franklin, Art Garfunkel line.

    I remember Chuck Lefley. I always thought he was actually very good. He lead a play-off making St. Louis Blues team in Scoring in 76. Gary Unger was on that team and Unger was still Ironman Unger – not he early eighties Oiler Unger or the radio color commentator Unger, Gawd has there ever been a worse radio man than Gary Unger? And yes he was worse than Semenko. Anyway, Lefley was a big man for his time and certainly had game. At the start of his career the Habs thought he might be better than Lafleur. Uh, We know how that worked out. He burned out too early, but Lefley at his best was a top ten NHL goal scorer. He was even from Manitoba – man that LT is good on the comps.

    LT had beauty post on Butch Goring and if Cogs can only live up to half that billing we’ll have Todd Marchant and that’s not too bad.

    Tommy Albelin was a contributor on a Stanley Cup winner; He had a long steady NHL career and was a stalwart on the Swedish national team. Lets face it folks, despite what spin master K-Lowe says, Smid is not the second coming of Chris Pronger. If he can be a top four NHL defenseman like Albelin in his prime we should all be happy.

    Maybe we should start calling Souray Stormin’. People might forget that although Gorman Thomas had a “Howardian” strike out rate, he had a decent enough glove to play center field to go along with those 40 homers he’d hit in a year. The fan in me wants to think that Souray can follow suit, that despite a whole bunch of strikeouts and a lousy batting average, Souray will still be able to play a steady if unspectacular centerfield and crank out monster shots to the tune of 45hr’s and have a ton of walks.

    Now if I haven’t over extended the baseball metaphor I want to offer up this thought. I’ve been down in Arizona and I caught game one of the cubs vs. d-backs series. The fan in me wants to believe that the Oilers can be the NHL’s version of the Diamondbacks. On paper the D-backs don’t look so special, actually they look kinda suspect, but their record and performance against the Cubs speaks for itself. A ton of good young guys a few key vets and a bunch of magic – Anybody, Anytime is their mantra. I can see Horcoff as Eric Byrnes without the goofy haircut and the TV show. Byrnes is an under appreciated veteran talent that has blossomed in a primetime role he might not have gotten anywhere else. Sound familiar? For the Oilers to do well this year Horcoff needs to be Eric Byrnes and Roli is going to have to be Brandon Webb

    Now that might be a stretch but hey we’re in first place!

  5. Mr DeBakey says:

    I remember spinning
    Glen Campbell’s Galveston
    and Perry Como’s Seattle
    Sort of Travelogue USA

    AT least JFJ was on the ice for a GF last night.
    I believe that is a first.

  6. PDO says:

    but this is many beers ago.

    LT.

    You’re my hero, and I think I have to steal this line.

  7. Black Dog says:

    LT – I have said it before and I know I will say it again.

    Beauty post.

    At least they didn’t leave the poor guy to rot on the vine like last fall.

  8. Dennis says:

    The Dbacks finished 18 games over .500 and yet were -20 in runs differential. Try repeating that again though I know, I know, they’ve got some good young bats who will get better and some of them sucked this year.

    And JFJ was on the ice for a goal last year in the home game to Stl that the Oilers lost in OT. Can’t remember if it was on the PP or not though I do remember it was scored by Horc.

    I’m as big of a JFJ fan as anyone but with Cogs looking like a player and Gagner likely to be even better than that, plus Pouliot having shown something last year if not so far this year, Jacques window may have closed. All he’ll need to do now to land a permanent place in the bad books is to go down in the A and underproduce. And by that I mean go less than a PPG because given it’s his third year down there, he should be on the scoresheet at least once a game.

    And what’s this about Semenko being a colour guy?

  9. PDO says:

    The Dbacks finished 18 games over .500 and yet were -20 in runs differential.

    And it looks like they’re off to the NL championship, being they’re up 2-0.

  10. Black Dog says:

    Jacques’ one chance is if the Oilers fail bigtime and either Torres or Penner go down with an injury and he has produced enough in the A to warrant another shot. If the Oilers have nothing to lose they may throw him into a top six role to see if its a case of him needing better linemates to get rolling. And if he does well then things change.

    But his failure to make even the tiniest impact as a crash and bang energy guy is disappointing and a little perplexing.

  11. NBOilerFan says:

    One of my favorite Christmas songs (though my favorite is Dwight Yoakam’s version – who of course is a huge Buck Owens fan).

    Funny as hell.

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