Jesus Arrives in Toronto

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31 Responses to "Jesus Arrives in Toronto"

  1. Black Dog says:

    I think I saw Him at McVeigh’s having a rum.

    Brilliant, LT, very nice.

    Have to be honest though, never saw it coming.

  2. Lowetide says:

    Well my wife (hardcore RC) is none too pleased.

  3. Alice says:

    If he’s the Hockey Jesus, how are we going to market El Schremp?

    Oh yeah, Sugartits. Nevermind

  4. Doogie2K says:

    And yet somehow the beatification of St. Wendel comes before the appointment of Pope Brian I. Religion is all about politics and money these days, lemmetellya.

  5. Alice says:

    I was quite prepared to tee off on the MLSE/HNIC/Simmons/Shoalts orgy that’s going to go on this weekend, here near the COTFU,

    He tells the media: hey that was fun, but put it back in your pants for a while. The trade front is going to be pretty quiet so go back to work.

    He tells the fans: not that they’re going to be lost in the wilderness, but that he’s going to give them a competitive and entertaining team, win or lose. So he’s promising them something he can deliver, which is not a playoff spot. Nice level set, with something positive.

    And by insisting what a Privilege it is to work and to play hockey in Toronto, the COTHU, he’s not only pandering to the locals who want to hear that, he’s putting the players and their agents on notice – hometown discounts are going to be the rule across the board, else go play in Columbus, or bloody Edmonton. He’s not going to act like the players hold all the cards, that’s for sure

    Pretty damned smart [add your own colorful adjectives here] fellow.

    And of course I’m looking forward to 4.5 years of No More Speculation as to the GM of the TML, too.

    Things could be worse.

  6. Lowetide says:

    I should say that this is extremely likely to work out well for the Leafs and their fans. I don’t think Burke is much at the draft table and he’ll rip through their prospect base pretty quickly (using them as trade bait).

    But there are some good players here. Antropov is likely gone and I wouldn’t be surprised if he got a sniper in exchange for Kaberle.

    It’ll be a fun deadline.

  7. Lowetide says:

    Alice: Thanks for that, I didn’t see the PC but that sounds reasonable.

    I wonder if he’ll get Hiller out of Anaheim and trade his goalie.

  8. bookie says:

    LT – just tell your wife that you are satirizing the media bowing down before a symbolic individual on whom one must adopt with faith, not some kind of objective rational evaluation of the evidence. You are not somehow mocking the RC Church.

    I certainly hope he leaves there in 8 years having accomplished nothing. I would enjoy immense shadenfraud for both Leaf fans, the City of Toronto, and Brian Burke.

    I would suffer at a great emotional depth if he were succesful in Toronto. I would then have to respect him and I am afraid that would be painful.

  9. Coach pb9617 says:
  10. Lowetide says:

    coachpb9617 you magnificent bastard.

  11. Black Dog says:

    coach, you are a beauty

  12. dstaples says:

    LT, nice to see someone else struggling with photoshop!

    I’ll have to give my old “Gimp” program a go on this one as well.

  13. dstaples says:

    Oh, I see that was done by the coach, not LT.

    Burke is such an incredible goof. How can we not worship an ego of such monstrous proportions? Alex Baldwin has got to play him in the made for TV movie.

  14. raventalon40 says:

    First move that Brian Burke will make is acquire Todd Bertuzzi.

  15. Black Dog says:

    Leafs 1 and 0 in the Burke era.

    I hope the parade next June doesn’t come too close to my house. Wake the baby.

  16. raventalon40 says:

    Speaking of photoshop David Staples:

    Jesus H. Burke goes to Toronto

  17. dstaples says:

    OK, raventalon, that is frakkin’ brilliant.


    Certainly puts me to shame, though that ain’t saying much when it comes to photoshop. I’d throw a link to the one I’m putting up on my own blog, but I don’t know how to imbed a link here, plus no use lookin’ at my amateur work.

    I’m going to post your photoshops as well, though . ..

  18. Black Dog says:

    oh Jesus

    so to speak

    third jersey?

  19. Fake Craig McTavish says:

    As much as everyone likes to pile on I would wager Burke could win a Cup before Lowe.

    He isn’t perfect. But he’s not stupid.

  20. Black Dog says:

    Fake MacT – Heh. He already did.

    Its going to be interesting. Between him, Wilson and the media here.

    Oh Jesus.

  21. raventalon40 says:

    It’s supposed to be a play on the image that TSN put up.

  22. Coach pb9617 says:

    Oh, I see that was done by the coach, not LT.

    Damn you staples! It was an MSPAINT created for speed, not beauty. Like Butch Goring.

  23. Fake Craig McTavish says:

    Burke 1- World 0

  24. Coach pb9617 says:

    Anyone else have an inkling that JDD goes tomorrow?

  25. Lord Bob says:

    In spite of all the enthusiasm, when asked about the appointment, Kevin Lowe said only “Jesus is just all right with me.”

  26. Coach pb9617 says:

    All of a sudden, Lowe is reading a ton of Nietzsche.

  27. dstaples says:

    Burke’s big contract has got to be a thorn to Lowe and all those other GM/Prez guys.

  28. doritogrande says:


    I just woke family members laughing too hard. That should have been posted with a warning.

    We now must quickly offer up Alex Plante and Steve Staios for Mikhail Grabovski and Alexei Ponikarovsky

  29. raventalon40 says:

    Doritogrande: unfortunately the warning is on the blog and not on the image. My bad. I’m glad you enjoyed it though.

    I’d assume that Jeff Finger is playing the “Steve Staios” role already in Toronto. We’d have to offer something else. I’m sure Brian Burke would love a guy like Theo Peckham, which is exactly why we can’t deal with him because Theo Peckham is on my “most anticipated Oiler blueliners” list.

  30. eyebleaf says:


    He’s everything we thought he’d be. Already.

  31. bookie says:

    In the Sun today Burke called his new post with the Leafs “a dream job,” comparing it to what “the Vatican is to catholics.” Said Burke: “The man who brings a championship to this city will have schools named after him.”

    Brian Burke Secondary School? We’ll have to wait and see if it ever happens.

    I dont know what to say to that.

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